Tuesday, August 30, 2011

Chore List

My son, as I mentioned, has Asperger's and ADHD, as well as being an elementary-age boy. Thus trying to get him to do anything can be a chore. To help him learn to help himself, we've set up a chore list with specific self-care tasks like "Eat All Your Lunch" and "Give Yourself a Good Bath." We are trying to motivate him to be a better & more independent person. If he does a task, he gets a small star; if he does a week's worth of that task, he gets a smiley star. For every increment of 8 smiley stars he gets (there's only 8 lines on the chart,) he gets a reward. He's allowed one "off day" for any task.

It's going pretty slowly.

But it seemed to me, that if I'm going to challenge him to be a better person here at the start of school, I should challenge myself to be a better person, too.

So I got myself a chore chart. Made myself a list of things I ought to do everyday, but am often unmotivated to do. Same rules for me, too, with stars, smiley stars, 8s and rewards.

After the same three weeks, I'm only one smiley star ahead of my son. Not that this is a competition.

When I started thinking about using my chore chart as a post, I realized that all these things are things I can do to help combat my depression. Well, new habits are just as hard to break in as old ones are to break out.


Monday, August 29, 2011

50 Posts, last published on Feb 19, 2011

OK. I'm a lousy Blogger.

The boy-child did survive-- quite heartily-- his gastro "spell."

I finally got on anti-depressants about a month later. Honestly, they do help a lot. Nope, I didn't immediately find a huge weight lifted off of my shoulder and felt compelled to sing my joy to the heavens. If THAT had happened, that would have been a bad thing and proved that I was bi-polar and needed something else entirely.

It's been a slow change. It has taken the edge off of some of my "bad" feelings. Has opened up a clear phone line between the part of my brain that knows the truth "life is actually good" and the part of my brain that whimpers loudly "I can't do anything." There's still much to do. I'm still marginally motivated, and spend too much time playing "stupid computer games."

But, it's getting better, little bit at a time.

Yea me.

Monday, June 13, 2011

Up to Three Now

I've been blessed, so far, that it's always happened at home. The second one came out in the morning this time last year, but this one happened before bed, like the first one.

Seven years old and my son only has three teeth gone. I know that I shouldn't compare him to other kids, but it seems like every other kid in his class has lost half a mouthful of teeth. Thinking about my own dental progress, I lost mine rather slowly as well, so there you go. It just seemed like I was losing a tooth every couple of months.

MLB doesn't react to unanticipated change very well. I could say "change" altogether, but I have gotten him used to the idea that some things in life are variable. This is a good thing to instill in an Aspie kid, but it's changes that are minor things in the ebb and flow a family life: one day dinner is at 5:30, another day it's at 7:00; one week there's a bath every night, and the next it's every other day.

Losing a tooth is a major change. For me, it seemed like I was always losing a tooth, because, as soon as it started loosening, I'd start wiggling it and worrying it. I'd use my finger or my tongue-- even the edge of my desk for my top incisors (I really wanted my 1st grade teacher Mrs. Woody to pull one of my teeth; everyone said she was the best at tooth pulling, and I didn't want to advance to 2nd grade without getting my chance.) There was always a loose tooth or lost tooth space in my mouth.

MLB won't let us know when his teeth are loose. We find out from his dentist which ones are wiggly. Wiggling his own teeth feels too weird to him. He won't say so, of course, but we know he doesn't like "weird" things. He very rarely even lets me wiggle a tooth to see its progress.

This one was a surprise, as usual. I knew his secondary lower incisors were loose; with those big ol' primary incisors coming in, they really had no chance. I'm surprised they stayed in this long, and that it's been a year since he lost his second tooth. His eating has been off and he's wanted things like his pizza & hot dogs cut up lately. I was hoping that these were clues that another tooth would come out soon.

The loose tooth did not keep him from crunching up a biscotti for dessert, which likely just set the stage...

MLB & I were reviewing his chore chart after he'd brushed his teeth. He was very excited, since he'd earned four more smiley stars to bring his total up to 32 (which means another hour of computer time & a family trip to carpet golf.) He was chewing on the strap of a toy camera while he was bouncing in excitement. Suddenly, "Oh, it came out!" I turned to see one hand clasped firmly over his mouth, and the other curled in a fist.

"Let me see," I requested. "Mmmfmmphn," was the reply. I held out my hand. "No, not your mouth. I mean your tooth." He tipped the tooth into my hand, which made all the better to clasp both hands over his mouth. There was much whimpering & anxiety, some tears. I was curious to know which side, but he wasn't ready to loosen up any more than what already loosened. We offered to call a grandmother, but he wasn't ready to even talk. He did think my suggestion of calming down while watching the end of "Land Before Time IV" was good. Ah, the panacea of TV.

When the credits were rolling, he was more comfortable with one less tooth. I was shown the space (left side.) He helped me with reading the Magic Treehouse book we've been working on. He even gladly talked with Babchu & Paw-paw on the phone and told them how he was looking forward to the Tooth Fairy bringing him two half-dollars.

Nuts to normal in less than 15 minutes. Some parts of growing up do get easier with time.